Hi all,
How do we pray for a person deconstructing their faith? How do we talk to them?
How to pray
Jesus said in John 6:45: “Everyone who has heard and learned from the Father, comes to me.”
Hearing from the Father happens inside, internally, in the wrestling of thoughts and ideas. IF a person will learn what He is saying, they will come to Jesus.
In Matthew 16: 16-17 Peter exclaimed: “You are the Christ, the Son of the living God.” Jesus told him: “You are blessed Simon, for man didn’t reveal this to you, but my Father in heaven.”
Peter heard and learned from the Father, and came to Jesus.
Paul’s prayers for others were also ‘internally focused’
In Ephesians 1: 17-19 he prays:
“…cease not to give thanks for you, and that God the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, will give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of Him (Father), that the eyes of your understanding would be opened to know the riches of His glory…”
Ephesians 3: 14-20 provides more insight into his prayer in the first chapter:
“For this reason I bow my knees to the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, of whom the whole family in heaven and earth is named. I pray that He (Father) out of His glorious riches, will strengthen you with power by His Spirit in your inner man…so that you would be rooted and grounded in (unconditional) love, so you will know the full volume of the love of Christ which is beyond knowing in the mind….”
Combine those into a prayer for that loved person:
“Father, I lift up ____ to you in the name of Jesus. I ask you give them the Spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of you, that you would open the eyes of their understanding to know your invitation in Jesus. That by your Spirit you will strengthen them in their inner man so they will become rooted and grounded in your love Father. That they will then be able to comprehend your great love for them beyond their ability to reason it out. Let them know that they know they are loved by you. Reveal these things to them deep inside them Father, and strengthen them to hear and believe, and come to Jesus with these revelations….” and words to that effect.
You can rebuke the devil over their lives all you want, but the human will is sovereign, and the whole kingdom flows from revelation from the Father. First, that Jesus is His son given for us, and then all else. It IS all about internal revelation from the Father. Pray for them accordingly. Don’t tell the Father what you want Him to do, ask Him to do what He has already revealed about how He works in the inner man. Work WITH Him instead of telling Him what to do.
Talk to them, as they allow, as they wrestle.
Don’t get in the Father’s way by trying to reap a harvest before it is time. You may need many conversations with them over years as they wrestle. The Father is persistent. You may be on a roller coaster with them – up and all for God one moment, then down in a valley the next. You won’t be able to see what the Father is doing in them internally, but when you see them wrestling with things deep inside, it is evidence it is the Father working.
Many see someone wrestling and think it is the devil after them. Certainly he can be an opponent in wrestling, but the match is between the Father and the person’s will, and truth. Jesus is Truth.
They use the same words but use a different dictionary to define those words.
When people in popular culture mix up the differences between objective truth (Jesus) and subject truth (pop culture) communication becomes confused and unclear.
A very common example of using the same words but a different dictionary to define them, is the Jehovah Witnesses. They say they believe in Jesus, but they believe Jehovah created Jesus as the arch angel Michael. They believe when Jesus was born He was mere man, not God in the flesh. They believe Jesus wasn’t literally raised from the dead, but only spiritually raised.
Same words, different dictionary. That’s what is happening in popular culture. Therefore we need to define things for a struggling person. Bring them back not to religion, but the wisdom of how God defines things.
Deconstruction is not about rebuilding a correct understanding of God
So in their struggles, we have to rebuild that for them, brick by brick, over time, letting each brick of truth settle into and solidify with its mortar. The brick is the truth, the Holy Spirit and your wisdom are the mortar. It will take time for each ‘brick’ to connect with other bricks by the Holy Spirit mortar.
Deconstruction is not about getting your faith in God right, it’s about making your views on everything match reality as seen in popular culture. So as we pray for the Father to give them revelation, to wrestle with them, to separate popular culture’s thoughts from the objective truth of Jesus Christ and the love of the Father.
Deconstruction has no end goal, no destination to deconstruction.
When remodeling a building one does so with the intent to rebuild. Not so with those deconstructing their faith. They are just deconstructing.
The Father is internally, moving them from the authority of self to the authority of God. Satan used deconstruction in the Garden of Eden. “Has God said?” (Genesis 3:1)
Before the act of sin occurred, a lie was received. To say another way, an idea to deconstruct what God said came before the act. It was a lie, but the lie is designed to deconstruct what God said, and to bring confusion into the thoughts and emotions.
A loved one going through deconstruction is like a divorce. A divorce is a living death. It is a goodbye and hello again cycle that stirs up old memories and emotions. When we help someone reconstruct their ideas and faith in God, we need to focus on one brick of truth at a time, reaffirmed by our love for them, that we are for them, that we are here for them. In their wrestling with God and themselves, like any construction process, it doesn’t look like the beautiful finished building – but give it time and faith in the Father’s faithfulness.
New subject next week, until then, blessings,
John Fenn
